Erin...*shakes head*

Erin, sweet Erin...I think its very age appropriate for her to be fascinated by public restrooms. I cant take her anywhere without her doing the pee pee dance the moment we walk thru the door..Nevermind that she went just as we left the house. I dont mind taking her to the bathroom, so long as she doesnt wait until I have full cart in tote before hollering. The second thing I DO mind, is when she feels the need to touch everything in that bathroom once we are in there. Its like she needs to christen it with Erin goodness, or something. To mark her territory before making in the toilet, if you will. She starts by fondling the walls as she walks in, then drops to her knees and scoots on her belly across the floor to look under the stalls for feet..Then after I cause a scene by making her get up while i'm secretly gagging, she pulls down her britches, clutches both sides of the toilet to hoist her self up, does her business, wipes..looks at the paper, reaches as far down into the toilet as possible to drop it in, then stands up to dress...Afterwards she becomes facinated with the automatic flushing mechanism, and crouches down low, still hugging the bowl, to watch her stuff get sucked out of sight....I swear she does everything disgusting, short of licking the bowl! When we are done, I feel I have to bath her completely from head to toe in the sink before exiting the premesis! Am I the only one who has this problem??

My Eric

Whilst driving to the thrift store(October 2007ish), in search of Halloween costumes, Eric brought up the question of having another brother or sister. I told him very matter-of-factly, that mommy couldn't have anymore cuz the doctor made sure I wouldn't. He then dove deeper asking how. So I told him that the doctor put a paper clip on mommies fallopian tubes, so that mommy couldn't make anymore....To which he asked "How does a clip on your Pinocchio tube keep you from having babies?" Through my tears of laughter, I was forced to explain about the egg and fertilization to my 6 year old. I know he didn't understand a word of it..but he thanked me for the info just the same, and promptly changed the subject to toys.

My Children....Skylars turn

Whilst visiting Gramma Debbie during the summer, Skylar and she were doing some yard work that involved pitching rocks under the deck where nobody could see them. It was a miserable task and hot under the noon day sun. Upon doing this for a short time, Skylar pitched her last rock and announced "Gramma, I just don't have time for this," put her hands on her hips and walked away. My little darling was 2 years old at the time. I can't imagine what she will be like as a teenager.

My Children....back to Eric

This week happens to be the week of Eric's very first Santa's Secret Shop at school. (He is now in kindergarten)..You all remember those right? So I gave him 5 dollars.. $2 for Erin's present, $2 for Skylar's present, and $1 for him to buy something fun. When he came home he wrapped up the girls gifts then held out before me the gifts he bought for himself. 2 hot pink super balls. I said "Wow honey, those are cool...You got pink, huh?" He scratched his head then said to me very matter of factly, "I like all colors, mom..to include pink." (Keep in mind he is 5.) Eric now begins to follow me around the entire rest of the day saying things like, "Mom, watch what I can do with my balls," or "Mom! watch me play with my balls.." My personal favorite of the day was, "Hey look mom, I can fit my little pink balls into my pants pocket!" Do you know how hard it is to keep a straight face?? I mean...this is ME we are talking about. It was a sad day in our household when Eric approached me to say he had lost his balls.

My Children....This time its Erin Rose

Out of sheer boredom tonight, I've decided to post another little blurb about my kids..This time its about my dear sweet Erin Rose,(or Missy as we all call her). Here is a little insight into her strange personality. I love her to death!

If you are ever at the grocery store bending down to read the labels on the bottom shelf of the canned goods isle..be careful. My Missy has been known to knock a stranger off balance with one quick nudge, in the hopes of helping them off the floor with a quick "Hi! I'm Erin!" Its a little mortifying...slightly sadistic...and socially unacceptable, but you cant help but laugh at the lengths she would go just to make a friend. Its hard to be mad at a fiery red head with a gappy tooth grin.

My Children....

From the time my son was 5, I started writing down all the funny, horrible, disgusting, and amazing things my kids have done, in the hopes that one day I can make a book for them to look back on. I sorta wanted to share a few on occasion, starting with the very first incident that inspired this project. Be on the lookout for more to come! Here is Eric's first story:

My son(at this time, age 5) does so many strange things. The kinds of things that infuriate me, make me laugh or make me want to cry. Tonight he managed to make me do all of the above. After dinner this evening before it was time for bed, Eric came to me in my room and softly said, "When you put me to bed tonight I want you to close your eyes so you don't see the bad thing I did in my room." You can imagine what thoughts raced through my mind...Was it like the "I wanted to make egg salad sandwiches" incident where dozens of cracked raw eggs, a loaf of bread, and a pot lay hidden under my dining room table? Was it going to be as disgusting as that day he couldn't make it to the bathroom on time so a natural squat in his toy box sufficed? Maybe another artistic endeavor was made with sharpie markers on his walls? I bravely asked him "What did you dooooooo..." He hung his head low and refused to speak..I reminded him that he isn't physically punished for telling me things outright but if I had to discover them on my own then he would regret it. He replied, "I broke your wall...." My eyes lit up in horror. "I broke your wall" he continued, "while trying to show Erin I could swing from the curtains like a super hero." As I put my kids to bed I noticed he had indeed broken my wall...Where the curtain rod had once rested peacefully, a crumbling mess of gaping holes and plaster now lay...I can only hope that in the near future I can laugh about the things he does in the name of entertainment and blissful ignorance. Until then, writing is the only way I can express myself while pulling my hair out.

Today I salute Roller Skating!

At the tender age of 6 I borrowed my neighbors skates (2 sizes too big) and began practicing in the carport of our Beale AFB housing unit. By age 7 I had my very first pair of white skates with hot pink wheels. Oh the memories! I practically lived in my skates for years. It was AMAZING. Spins, twirls, rolling down hills in the squat while holding one leg out, off the ground, down long hills....Life was good! (And my legs looked great!) Around Jr. High the skates were hung up and other interests took over...However I find myself now, at age 31, reembarking on my roller skating journey! I have become fascinated with Roller Derby. My adult friends have taken to calling me up on a Saturday night just to hang out at the nearest rink. My new goal is to own a black pair of skates with hot pink flames. I know...I'm a dork. As I step onto that slick floor to old skool classics, the old familiar thigh burn comes back to me as I do cross-overs around corners, trying not to knock over the nearest little kid who happens to roll in front of me. Its a nostalgic and amazing feeling....not to mention a great work-out! So today I salute you, Fountain Valley Skate Center! I plan to visit you at least once a month!