From the time my son was 5, I started writing down all the funny, horrible, disgusting, and amazing things my kids have done, in the hopes that one day I can make a book for them to look back on. I sorta wanted to share a few on occasion, starting with the very first incident that inspired this project. Be on the lookout for more to come! Here is Eric's first story:
My son(at this time, age 5) does so many strange things. The kinds of things that infuriate me, make me laugh or make me want to cry. Tonight he managed to make me do all of the above. After dinner this evening before it was time for bed, Eric came to me in my room and softly said, "When you put me to bed tonight I want you to close your eyes so you don't see the bad thing I did in my room." You can imagine what thoughts raced through my mind...Was it like the "I wanted to make egg salad sandwiches" incident where dozens of cracked raw eggs, a loaf of bread, and a pot lay hidden under my dining room table? Was it going to be as disgusting as that day he couldn't make it to the bathroom on time so a natural squat in his toy box sufficed? Maybe another artistic endeavor was made with sharpie markers on his walls? I bravely asked him "What did you dooooooo..." He hung his head low and refused to speak..I reminded him that he isn't physically punished for telling me things outright but if I had to discover them on my own then he would regret it. He replied, "I broke your wall...." My eyes lit up in horror. "I broke your wall" he continued, "while trying to show Erin I could swing from the curtains like a super hero." As I put my kids to bed I noticed he had indeed broken my wall...Where the curtain rod had once rested peacefully, a crumbling mess of gaping holes and plaster now lay...I can only hope that in the near future I can laugh about the things he does in the name of entertainment and blissful ignorance. Until then, writing is the only way I can express myself while pulling my hair out.
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